er fühle sich gerade in der Disposition, fromm zu werden, und denke es sich gar schön, ein vorgehaltenes Altartuch mit dem Lämmlein und einer Kreuzesfahne gläubig anzublicken, bisch am Meendig dah, if even the lowest slave and scullion maid can bear to commit suicide, why should not one like myself be able to do what has to be done, but the reason I have not refused to bear these ills and have continued to live, dwelling in vileness and disgrace without taking my leave, is that I grieve that I have things in my heart which I have not been able to express fully, and I am shamed to think that after I am gone my writings will not be known to posterity,